Good news, other news

The tumor continues to shrink, meaning I stay on my current chemotherapy regimen. Hooray! Dr. B did her patented happy dance after the official measurement. Thanks to C's magic formula of antinausea drugs, I also gained 3 pounds. So, November 14 should be my last pre-op chemo cycle.

Which brings me to the other news. Although the tumor has responded well to chemo so far, it did start out as a big, honking, aggressively growing cancer. Now that we have the primary tumor under control, Dr. B has started thinking about the next steps: how to make sure I don't get any more cancer, particularly somewhere vital. Because my primary tumor, though smaller than it was, remains relatively large, and because of its initial aggressiveness, there is a (good) chance that I have secret cancer caches in other parts of my body, and only chemotherapy can really kill those off. The bilateral mastectomy will help make sure I don't get breast cancer on the left side, the radiation will help make certain I don't get cancer in any residual breast tissue on the right, AND will keep the lymph nodes from circulating any remaining hoard of cells. So Dr. B is considering a post-op second round of chemo to make sure that we have also rousted any particularly stubborn colonists from my vital bits.

So the most current plan is: Chemo through mid-November, Surgery early December, Radiation Jan-Feb, Chemo Feb-April?, and then Tamoxifen.

I admit, I was getting pretty attached to this being over in the early spring, but I am MORE attached to never having cancer again.

Chemo 7

Tomorrow, we find out if the new chemo is working. If the tumor continues to shrink (cross fingers and toes!) we are down to only 4 more weeks with chemotherapy. I can't frick frackin' wait. The whole process has become deeply normalized over the last few weeks. I am used to tiring easily, taking on little tasks instead of large ones, needing lots more help than I would prefer (thanks again to everyone who contributed to the bulb project!). All of a sudden, though, this interminable phase feels like it is shifting into the final stages. We have appointments with the surgeons next week to discuss the nuts and bolts of the surgery. It is time to find a radiation oncologist and get that organized. We are thinking about December, and trying to predict what sort of help I will need and for how long.

Personally, I'll soon need to adjust to a whole new set of changes to my ability to do things. I've been obsessed with finishing all the projects left in the house - paint that door, patch that crack, fix that threshold, organize that closet. My dad has been my hero, doing the big stuff and providing the knowhow to do things right. I can do light work, as long as I take lots of breaks. So I don't know how the surgery/radiation combo will change my ability repertoire. Or for how long. It will be great to get my higher brain function back online, but the physical limits don't sound like a whole lot of fun.

I just need to remember that this is all temporary.